I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
