So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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