these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize
