I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
