Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i think i scared a bird with my dick
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
