They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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