Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(949): View more from California

The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.

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(727): View more from Florida

it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling

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(337): View more from Louisiana

Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.

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(208): View more from Idaho

This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?

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(407): View more from Florida

Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.

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(901): View more from Tennessee

At least you have booty calls.

(1-901): View more from Tennessee

True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china

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(410): View more from Maryland

He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn

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(253): View more from Washington

It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.

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