we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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