physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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