I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Actions speak louder than pants.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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