is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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