she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
