I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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