I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
