Me. At least after what I've been through.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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