I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize
