I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
In other news, I just burned my penis
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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