they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
