thus making me awesome and them whores
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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