we have officially lost it.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
