Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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