He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
