She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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