It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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