Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
