He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Randomize
