It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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