What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
