SEEEEXXX PLEASE
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
