just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
