I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
