dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
