RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
