He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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