Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
