I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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