genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Randomize