11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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