I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
