Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Well I just put wine in my tea
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
