She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
