I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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