Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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