Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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