It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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