im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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