I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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