Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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