PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
