Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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